(Mi) What the world is missing.

What the world is missing

Mi

“You could come back to my room, if you want to I mean. I know it is against the rules but they don’t check anymore and…”

“I can’t Mi, I’m sorry…”

His rejection felt like he had come up to me and stabbed a kitchen knife through the gaps in-between my ribs before twisting it around. Had he not felt anything like I had and if that was the case why had he felt the need to undo my bra? I nearly chocked trying to find the words to say but there were none.

“It’s not that I do want to Mi. I’m on green. 10 minute checks they say but I swear they are checking me every two or three. It’s a pain in the arse.”

“Connor you were acting like an Arse. I mean honestly what got into you? You don’t need to act all hard and bolshie. You won’t impress anyone and you won’t get back out of this place any faster if you don’t make peace with people. It’s Christmas in twelve days’ time Connor and you land yourself back in here.  What the hell happened?” I asked just before I tried to twist my arm around to do my bra up again but the stiffness in my wrist prevented me. I groaned with a huff. Sixteen year olds shouldn’t have had problems with their wrists especially ones that they had apparently brought on their self’s It was pathetic.

“I wanted to be back here Mi,” Connor said softly as he came around to my side and moved his arms up under my shirt so he could hock my bra back together again. I shuddered at his touch trying to resist the urge to lunge at him again and lock my lips around his again. I wanted to yell at him for what he was saying but it was impossible to be mad when I could feel his skin touching mine. “It’s fucking scary out there. There are no walls around you, no one telling you what to do. You can walk into any place when you are out there and there are a million things to get your impulses to go into overdrive and trying to control them all of the time it’s exhausting but that wasn’t even the worst bit. For everything that there is out there it is missing something as well and I know it is stupid and irrational but it is true. I would rather be trapped in prison with you, then live as a free man without you.”