On shaking ground

This isn't so good. Please bare in mind this is just a first draft 

I smiled sadly as I allowed Emmets words to comfort me. I suppose I had known it somewhere inside of since the first time Bella found me in the bathroom all those months ago. I had seen it as strength on her part when in fact it had been her illness that made her try and cover the part of me that was so anorexic. She liked anorexia she was letting it control her life and was happy when she found a friend. She fought it and she meant me no harm by not telling she thought she was doing a good thing. There wasn’t a bad bone inside of Bella’s body that would even consider doing anything other but if she had told that day no matter how much it killed me inside she would have been finding me the help that my withering body needed.

“You’re doing really well…” Emmet’s words where cut of midsentence from a smashing noise and a shrill throaty snarl of distress from outside in the corridor that felt like it made the walls shake

“I was going to say that you are doing really well today but that sounds like something that needs checking out.” Emmet smiled as he jumped off of my bed and went to my door followed my myself to see Hev screaming at her smashed up mobile phone on the floor and kicking angrily at the all ready scuffed paint work on the walls.

“What the hell has happened my love?” Emmet asked with his hands after he managed to get her attention at the same time as I asked her what was wrong with mine. Hev’s hands exploded into s flurry of action in return. Most of the words where shouted in with a bunch of expletives but nothing really made any sense and when she was done Emmet looked down at me to see if I had managed to pick up the conversation which I hadn’t.

“Errr… Something about glue sniffing up start penis monkeys…” I said aloud my heart going out to Hev as she started to sob and fall down the wall.

“Yeah that is about as much as I got too” He said before signing to Hev to slow it down what she was saying. She couldn’t slow it down. She was too sad to make her hands form the proper words and her shoulders shook from her tears. I had never seen Hev like she was then. She had never presented anything other than her bubbly self. She had had times of low mood when she wasn’t so eager to get in with things but this was different from that. What was in front of me was devastation and disaster and it made my body hurt to watch

“Come on my love, It’s all right, it’s OK.” Emmet signed gently going over to her and wrapping his arm around her shoulders. I stayed back by the door of my bedroom trying to give them as much space as I could without fully disappearing out of Emmets sight which would have meant he would have to come and get me.

“It’s my parents, I hate them.” I heard Hev say aloud barley eligible through h her tears. I had never heard her actually chose to talk aloud before and even though to me there was something actually beautiful in how she tried to form words even though she couldn’t hear them I could understand why her speech was enough to render her mute rather than try. If there was one thing anyone learnt about being alive in the world it was the fact that people where cruel about things that were different.

“What have your parents done to upset you like this. I take it that they just text you?”

“There extending their trip over Christmas.” Hev singed with her heavy hands even though after the initial outburst of anger they now just looked sluggish and heavy in the way she used then. “They were meant to come back and get me for Christmas so I could get out of here but now there not coming and I’m not even sure where I am going to go. They always do this to me. I am never important enough for them.”

I hated Hev’s parents. It was extreme reaction seems I had never met them before to say that I hated them but that in a way was the point.  Hev loved her mother and her farther, she pretended that they didn’t rule her whole life and she didn’t care what she said but it was lies. She wanted to be their perfect child. She wanted to be everything that they wanted from her and she would cross deserts and swim oceans to do it but they treated her like shit. She was not good enough for their miserable little world. It didn’t mean that she wasn’t good enough, she was, for Emmet for me we saw her beauty but in a way she cared little about us. She had swallowed a packet of pills to try and show her parents she was miserable and she wanted them and they had yet to even see her or make any real contact and now even over Christmas where families where pushed together, even pretend ones like the one I was going to be a part of they decided not to include there daughter in there fun but leave her stranded in a hospital. It was unforgivable, Hev was their gift not their inconvenience.

“I am sorry that has happened Hev. Did they tell you why they had to stay away longer? As for where you will go you will stay here in the hospital with staff for Christmas day with one or two of the other patients and there will be some fun stuff going on I can find out who is working if you want. I know Ava and Alice are on in the morning when you get up.”

Hev didn’t respond instead stayed looking down at her legs her head bowed low over them. Emmet could give her no comfort and in a way he knew it too he could make up words that flowed out from his hands but there was a bit that felt for her like anyone would. There were no words to describe the feelings that went with the fear that the Bears would do it to me and she had just had it crashed upon her. I sulked away behind the bedroom door trying to catch my breath. Things where never as solid as they seemed.