I will always cry for this. (Mi's side)

I will always cry for this.

After I worked out how to make my head and legs work together again, I slipped silently passed Alice scooted behind Emmet and took of at a light run up the two sets of stares to the second floor and into my 3^rd new bedroom. Sunshine. I truly hated each and every name for the different rooms. Apple gate was portrayed to be a positive optimistic place but in reality it just wasn’t. If you were optimistic, if you had a future set for you in the world, if you had a boyfriend and fitted it well… you had no business claiming a room here to call your own. We were all here because we were considered acutely unwell. Our lives weren’t full of sunshine and we were hardly ever tranquil unless we were oblivious like Madeline. Hev was no exception to the rule of course. She had pumped the poison in and they had pumped it back out leaving her somewhere I was no stranger to. No mans land. A place between the living and the dead, were the laws of human nature were blurred. Our greatest sense as a human was meant to be our sense of self preservation. As humans above all our sense was to avoid situations were our life was put in danger. We were built to survive, however a few had erased those rule and now there was no guild line to what was right and wrong. We wanted to die… Well I had wanted to at least.

I wasn’t sure as to why the tears come as I flumped down on my bed and curled my self up, pocking my headphone’s into my ears and pressing the play button on my MP3 player. It played the Breaking dawn soundtrack from the Twilight Saga. Bella’s favourite. Now it was stuck on a continues loop on my player. She had been counting down the days to it’s cinema release on her calendar with a red marker and making the ancient computer in the day room wheeze out all the new trailers that were put on the internet. She had died three days prior to it’s release. Some of the girls still went with their pre-booked tickets. Bella, Summers and my self’s resided in the bin. Edward and Ava had tried to persuade both Summer and my self that we should go. I told him a film about immortality wasn’t for me at that present moment and went to bed early.

My whole body hurt. I didn’t know why but tears held me down. Hearing Hevs story had sent something inside of me spinning. She was just a child. 13 years old. Her body had barely hit puberty and she was ready to pack it all in and it was all because she felt so alone. Her world was silent and her only communication was done via her hands but her parents decided she wasn’t aloud to do that because she looked “strange waving her arms about it that undignified manner.” They said she should read lips and learn to talk, but people laughed at the way she spoke and she just couldn’t read lips all that well. I hated the world and its injustice. All the people it failed. The one’s that just fell through the cracks. The parents that destroyed the things that were meant to be most precious to them just because they weren’t perfect. The fact that it took the wrong one’s before their time. So I cried. I cried out the pain and the anger until my chest and tummy hurt. I cried until my hair was damp and a wet patch appeared on the side of my Pillow. I couldn’t stop.