This cannot end well

This cannot end well

I stopped pacing instantly and snapped my body around to look at Esmee. I scrutinized every part of her body to try and see what she was playing at. I had had an out and out ban on running since I had walked into the unit. In fact I had had an out and out ban on any type of exercise unless it was monitored closely and anything that was allowed even then was not considered hugely calorie burning. Running was. I craved the power and energy of running again to have my heart really pounding inside of my chest and the muscles burning in the backs of my legs. I could run away from everything in the actual act of running. That was what made it so hard to stop.

“It’s night time. The rest of the staff won’t be happy you taking me out running, shouldn’t I be getting ready to sleep?” I asked the question in a half-hearted attempt to try and not to sound as elated as I actually did, my insides where doing back flips in there triumph and I had already physically moved over to my bed and pulled my trainers on with force.

“Nope they won’t be, that’s very true, but tell me honestly without this is there any chance of you actually going to sleep? Or is there more of a chance of you trying to break your arm on one of this walls. I rather run for a few minutes then spend the night in the Emergency department.”

I did not argue wither her further. Her decision fucked with my head but an older voice was fucking with it more and the promise of a run I could not ignore. Not even if I knew here was no chance of it actually ending well.