Friday, 12 September 2014

How I wish we could all be so easily mended


How I wish we could all be so easily mended

“I know they are bad now but these feelings will end eventually,” Esmee promised as I tried to drag my arm away from hers. I felt the lips of the wounds drag against the towel and sting with pain as I protested but she held on not letting the wounds see the light of day again. I wanted to shout at her. I wanted to make sure that she never got to touch me again because it wasn’t fair that she thought she knew what was better for me. It made no difference if I was allowed to bleed and it wasn’t like I wanted forever. I just needed a bit more time. “I need you to think about how this is going to work,” Esmee said firmly after I succeeded in dragging my arm away from hers and took delight in watching as fresh streams of blood poured from the gaping wounds. “You need to settle down and let me stop the bleeding or you will leave me no choice but to get heavy handed with you and do this by force, now how would you like this to work.”

“Because life’s that simple,” I snapped dipping my fingers into the newly formed puddles of blood before smearing them between my fingers so it could die the tips of my fingers an off red and give them an odd sticky feeling.

“I can’t recall saying that your choice was simple Mi but unfortunately it is one of those things that needs an answer no matter how hard it is now I would really like it if you would come and sit with me so I can sort out your arms if not I will have to resort to other options.”

It wasn’t fair. She had the time she needed no one stopped her when she hadn’t had enough and I didn’t want to be controlled. I was in control of my fate and I wanted to bleed. I growled in my frustration as the blood dripped new and golden from the ends of my fingertips. I couldn’t understand why she was so desperate for it to end.  

“Come on lets end this now,” Esmee said getting to her feet and coming over to me taking my arm back into hers and under the towel. I winced as she put pressure onto the wounds but fort the urge to try and drag my arm away from hers again.

“This isn’t fair,” I grumbled trying to resist the urge to drag the towel off of my arm and throw it across the room.

“I know it isn’t. I’m sorry but there is nothing that I can do about it,” Esmee said taking the towel off of the wounds and pulling the edges of them together with her fingers. “I’m going to have to stitch these up now.”

“What if this was you?” I moaned allowing Esmee to go about emptying packets of sterile water into a dish so she could start to bath my arms off

“It’s not me Mi, and things are different here compared to what they are in the real world. If I was in the hospital and I had done what you have in front of a nurse I would have been treated exactly the same. I wish I could have treated you differently but sometimes my hands are tied. Things will be different once you live with us,” Esmee soothes as she gently brushed gauze across the cuts allowing the blood to splinter into the tiny folds of my skin. “I can fight for you more.”

I felt calmer as Esmee talked and became more mesmerized at the way she worked over my arm. She was the exact opposite of their origins. She was smooth and soft and the cuts were angry and raised against the surface. She was going to sooth them somehow even If I wasn’t entirely happy with it.

“This bit is going to hurt.” I winced as Esmee pushed the point of a needle deep into one of the oozing wounds and injected the anaesthetic making the sides puff up and meat in the middle. I knew what came next, the sewing up, the healing of a wound that should never have been created and I quietly cried as I watched Esmee starting to sew me up wishing I was mended as easily.

1 comment:

  1. yay, so glad you're writing again. awesome update!

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