Esmee
“You look as
pale and anxious as she does.” My mother laughed taking a second custard cream
off of the table and putting it in to her mouth 80 calories. I did not
let myself count the calories that she had just put into her body or the amount
that I was putting into mine from the apple I was munching through. After all
we all needed to eat and the extra weight that was being packed on around my
body was because I was carrying a baby, my small little baby that was now just
a few days off of being 12 weeks and safer from all the horrors that lied out
there for it. I hated loved my body now It was back to a size 12 and my
bump was getting harder to hide unless I wore baggier tops. I always didn’t
think about food all that much now and what I ate was because I had too wanted
to. My tiny blip with my eating disorder was over, now I was pregnant
everything was OK.
“This is a
big deal for her.” I confirmed reaching out and helping myself to a custard
cream as well after eating my apple. “It makes me anxious. I know she will love
her room and everything but she is still fragile and I so want her here for
Christmas. We have to keep her calm. I have to look after her.”
“Whatever
will happen will happen Esmee and I am sure she is stronger than you think. She
reminds me of you in so many ways. She looks a bit like you. Though I’m not
sure why she is so tall.”
“Well I can
explain that, I’m short and she looks nothing like me mum that’s just you
wanting ot adopt her into the family.”
“I intend to
do just that Esmee. I always wanted a big family and you have given it to me.” She
smiled cramming the rest of her biscuit into her mouth.
“I should go
and cheek on her, she has been up there a while.” I said looking at my watch.
“Nope I’ll go
and see what she’s doing.” I was about to argue again about Mi liking certain
people but new I would lose as my mother was already out of the door and halfway
up the first flight of stares.
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