Damaged (Emmets side)

Damaged.

“Mi, Mia! Open your eyes for me Mia!” I yelled as I bundled her body back up onto the doctors bench and smashed the RRA with my thumb causing the light to blink very fast telling me all over the unit people would be responding to their alarms.

I hated to say it but even with years training in the A&E I couldn’t help but feel panicked. There was a good chance of me having to do CPR Mi was a walking time bomb and I thought I had just witnessed her go off. I had preformed CPR on someone very underweight once before and it was the most disgusting terrifying thing that I ever had to do. CPR on TV is portrayed very badly as is any death seen. There is always a nice clean pale human lying on her back while some over good looking doctor presses lightly on the chest in his very clean crisp scrubs with not a hair out of place on his head.. In reality there is a team of people each sweating with scrubs covered in the patients Vomit, urine, poo and blood. Every person taking a turn on CPR as it is a tiresome thing. the idea of it is to manually pump the heart to keep blood flowing around the body and oxygen going to the brain. The heart however is under the ribs, so you have to go through the ribs, ever rib cracks and breaks as you but your whole body weight behind every compression on the chest to get past the ribs to the heart and your job is not to feel as you hear every one break as your hand pushes through them. This of course is worse on someone who has no fat or muscles covering their ribs because every rib that is broken deforms and can be seen and felt through the skin. There is no doubt about it. CPR may save a patients life but it would leave them broken and Mi was all ready to broken, to hurt and to fragile for my heavy hands to brake all of her delicate ribs too.

“Yep, I’m here.” Esmee yelled as she swiped the card key in the door and stuck her head around the corner “What can I do?” I looked as Esmee’s face and closed my eyes begging her for someway to save me from the situation I was in. I had frozen solid In my stupid panic when is should of been doing something.

“What Emmet? What?” Esmee shouted running in to the room faster then I had ever seen any one run before.

“Just help her, she collapsed and she needs to be helped.” I stuttered taking five steps back towards the cabinets on the other side of the clinic room.

“Collapsed?” Esmee yelled doing what I should of done and ran over to Mi who was still lying lifeless on the bed her eyes closed, she looked peaceful to peaceful and I hated it.
“Emmet can you get me an oxygen mask please.” Esmee asked sweetly as she stroked the hair back off of Mi’s face with one hand and checked her pulse with the other before smiling sweetly and lowering her head to her mouth listing to her breath.

“I was scared Esmee, So scared.” I stuttered griping onto the cabinets behind me just so there was something to hold onto. “I thought it was her heart, I mean look at her she is so fragile and then she just collapsed and I didn’t want to do CPR, to break her ribs and beat up her body like that…”

“Emmet.” Esmee said softly smoothing Mi’s hair once more before turning and coming towards me and placing her hand on my chest while looking up into my eyes with hers Her eyes where sparkling and stunning, they where also sedating and they melted my soul causing all the anxiety slip away.

“Emmet, she has fainted that’s all and she may look fragile but looks can be deceptive. Remember I was fragile once.”

“Esmee I watched you almost bleed to death in front of me, you where fragile, I almost lost you and that is one of the most scary things i will ever have to go through."