Exactly her words (Mi's side)

If you arn't exactly sure waht the end of this chapter is about can i recomend rereading Esmee's fash back while she is talking to Emmet It should make better sence then. Enjoy.   :-)

Exactly her words
Edward and Ava left the room with a flick of there card keys the padded door once again slamming behind them encasing me in my padded prison which in turn somewhere made my heart rip some more, a sickening pain making my stomach retch and another sob to escape from my lips though I pressed them tightly closed.

“Hay, baby it’s OK.” Emmet said gently tracing circles into my back with his index finger”
“I can’t stand it in here.” I moaned “It’s like I am in a petting zoo or something and I know if you wanted at any second you could use that fucking magic piece of plastic you got and walk out of here and never come back again and what I hate the most is that really scares me. I never needed anyone until I come to this place being alone never scared me like it does now.” I sobbed unable to hide the pain that rippled through me.

“Shhhh, I wont leave you honey. I am going to stay here with you I promise I won’t go anywhere.”

“Trusting you is hard.” I squeaked. I did trust him I just had to wrestle with my self constantly to do it. Not trusting him would be easier and less demanding but with out my trust in him I had no one I was alone.

“I will just have to keep earning it then wont I.” Emmet said gently moving his big clumsy body onto the floor in a laying position next tm me so he could look into my face before he pulled the elastic of the mask over my head holding it in place and with both is hands he picked up mine and squeezed them tightly around it.

“Are the meds not taking the edge off of things at all?” Emmet asked quietly his eyes looking sympathetically into mine that silently misted over over again as I shook my head gently. Nothing helped.

“Do you feel worse?” He asked again squeezing my hand even tighter as the tears fell from my eyes and onto the outside of the mask.

“It has always been unbearable.”

“What is the feeling can you describe it to me?”

“ Rock bottom is a myth, you can always go lower. It hurts so much I have lost self preservation. As humans we are taught to fear and fight death but I would welcome it . Dying is not the worst thing Emmet, for me dying is good. For me it means an end to the hurting. I said softly allowing my face to smile as I thought about the end of everything I felt.. That was the only thing that would stop it now, my death.

“Exactly her words.” Emmet whispered to him self before he swallowed hard and squeezed his eyes tightly shut one single tear making a lonely track down the side of his face.