they came back (Mi's side)

OK so writers bloxk really sucks. I still have it but have tried to struggle though and write something. I am not sure if this is any good but i have tried. Please let me know if you don't think it's up to standered and i will try again.
vikki


They came back

　

“Hay, hay, its OK sweet heart it’s OK.” Emmet soothed stroking his fingers through my hair as he tried to rearrange himself better so I could sit better on his lap. “If only everybody was as existed as about me waking up in the morning the unit would run perfectly.” Emmet laughed holding me tight into him but I just continued to sob into his chest unable to laugh at his joke even though he was trying to make me feel better. I still couldn’t believe that he was actually there again and I could once again hold onto him. I still felt bad, depression didn’t just lift like that but with him there felt like there was a chance, with him the complete blackness that had always surrounded me shifted to dark greys

“Come on Sweetie, It’s OK, it’s all going to be OK.” Emmet soothed gently reaching up to my bedside table and pulling down the box of tissues before handing me one.

“I understand mornings have become very heard for you at the moment.” Emmet said softly as he rubbed big calming circles over my back as I continued to try -unsuccessfully admittedly - to catch my breath enough to form coherent speech.

There was so much that I wanted to ask Emmet that there seemed to be no time for my tears now. I wanted to know if he was OK and I wanted to know if she was OK and weather she would be coming back to work as well. I wanted to tell him if I had done something to cause their extended absence I was sorry, I wanted to tell him that I never meant to do any harm to them and I hated my self for hurting them but there was no words I could say and as the morning fully engulfed me the nausea hit hard along with the crying making me reluctantly let him go in haste so I could make my normal disoriented scramble to the bathroom where I could throw up.

“Hay Mi what’s the matter, where are you going?” I heard Emmet call after me as I reached the door of my room and tripped out into the corridor barley missing a grumpy Bella as she emerged out of Joy -her new high dependency room- growling at Edward about it being a teenagers right to be able to sleep in and skip breakfast.

Gasping slightly I ploughed off up the corridor at a sprint as I felt the vomit gush forcefully up my throat and into my mouth and only just managed to fling my self into the bathroom before the familiar murky liquid mixed with orange bile erupted out of my mouth and splattered onto the floor in a projectile fashion missing my target of the toilet by inches.

“Stupid fucking worthless piece of shit.” I growled at my self trying to stop the tears that rolled down over my face in a mixture of embarrassment and frustration turning into full on sobbing. “Stupid disgusting bitch from hell, why can’t I just fucking die?” I hissed chocking on the heard tears as I grabbed a few paper towels from the dispenser and throw them on the floor on top of the vomit as I tried to make my chest take some deep breaths around the wetness that was clogged inside of me. “Fucking useless bitch. Fucking useless worthless, completely idiotic fucking brain dead whore that can’t even get vomiting fucking…”

“Hay, hay Mi honey what’s all this about sweet heart.” I heard another sweet voce echo from behind me cutting me off as my self insulting got louder and once again all my muscles tightened in a spasm. Was it really possible that she had returned to? That like Emmet before Esmee could really be standing solid and real behind me?

“Sweat heart what’s the matter? What happened?” the same voice asked at the same time as placing her arm around me, the same velvet touch against my skin that made me know instantly that Esmee had returned too.

“I’ve thrown up on the floor,” I Wailed no longer able to contain the tears to simply crying, “I am so sorry, I tried to get to the loo in time but it was just so fast and so violent that I just couldn’t and I know I am stupid but I have told the doctor over and over that I can’t stop throwing up and…”

“Wowah, Mi honey its fine baby, its fine, all of its fine, we have all had this before it can’t be helped and it can be cleaned up easily enough, it’s absolutely…”

“Stupid! I’m so fucking stupid!” I sobbed

“No your not baby, your really not, I know you feeling terribly sad right now but it’s all OK. It’s going to get better OK.” Esmee said softly turning me around so I was looking right at her,

“You came back,” I whined as I looked up into her eyes and every defence and feeling from the last three weeks with out her came to smash into me in one go. “You came back Esmee,” I wept throwing my self into her arms much like I had done to Emmet’s, “you came back!”