The only drugs I really needed (Mi's side)

I can't write at the moment! I hate it and i am fairly sure i am producing poop but i really dont want to stop alltogether so this is a stab at a chapter.



The only drugs I really needed

Mi

Later that day Esmee had come up and got me from my room and towed my reluctant body down to Doctor Jordan’s office for yet another crisis appointment. I had told her not to bother, I had told her that I had moaned about my tablets to him a million and one times before I had given up completely but as always she was stubborn and refused to back down and she took me there anyway where she fort heard for me…and won.

My tablets where changed instantly and a fair amount was taken away until Esmee was happy and Doctor Jordan looked as battered down as what I felt just sitting there and watching the battle. On a number of occasions he had asked for my opinions on the situation but I just blindly agreed with Esmee knowing whatever she had planned to achieve would be in my best interest.

It took three days for the vomiting to stop and four more for my mood to stabilize. But within the space of a week I was feeling almost human again. I of course didn’t know how much of that was to do with the fact that my blood stream wasn’t so poisoned by tablets and how much of it was to do with the fact that Emmet and Esmee got back into the swing of there shifts easily Filling in most of the giant pit of despair that had been punched into me.

I almost hated my self for the fact that I allowed my self to get drawn back in to Emmet and Esmee again. They had left me with out a good bye and before I knew it there disappearance had been the one thing that really made me feel the worse.

Something inside of me shouted all the time that shouldn’t have got as close to them I should have ran away and even though I hadn’t then I should now but I didn’t and there was no way I could ever bring my self to pull away from them so like it or not they now seemed stuck somewhere bang smack in the middle of my life but maybe that wasn’t as bad as it seemed, Maybe Sophie had got it wrong all along when she told me I would be better alone after all I was nothing before I met them. I lived and I breathed and I wondered through life just wishing it Away. In short maybe Esmee and Emmet where worth feeling bad over because with the exception of Arabella no one had ever made me feel as good. Maybe Esmee and Emmet in reality where the only drugs I really needed.