I really hope that this is OK. I found this one of the hardest chapters ever to write so it might be a little rusty in places. It could also be considered triggering i think so be warend.
I want to change the world instead I close the blinds.
It broke every rule in the book but I had to let Summer stay. For a start there was no one to drag her away as I was still the one giving mouth to mouth while Jean did chest compression but B because Mi needed a friend. Was It right to make another Client have to hold the bleeding wounds of another patients arms. No but recant budget cuts decided that the number of staff needed on a high dependency children’s Unit at night was four instead of then usual six and only two of them had to be qualified nurses the result being Summer was actually now needed to aid Mi’s physical injuries for all me and jean had been doing to then was pump the blood around Mi’s body so it could piss out all over the floor.
“OK Summer you can stay but if it gets to much you must leave OK. There is no pressure for you to do anything in this situation OK.”
“Am, am I doing it right?” Summer stuttered glancing up the arm she held in the air “I want to do it right.”
“That’s perfect Summer you are doing really, really well.” I said gently trying to reassure her the best I could even though tears kept streaming down over my face her bottom lip quivering uncontrollably and her breathing fluttering in short burst from her lips.
“It’s OK Summer, it’s OK my honey.” I tried to sooth between giving vital resuscitation to Mi.”
“The RRA and ambulance are here!” Zak shouted making the crowd at the door part to let two very large men in the paramedic uniform enter the and one tiny looking female doctor. Who set about scurrying around Mi’s body faster then I had ever seen a doctor move before.
“It’s time to scoop and run,” The doctors announced to the paramedics after completing the checks she wanted to. “She is very very sick and her best chance is in a hospital. She announced to the two paramedics who sprang into action.“You kept her alive, well done.” The doctor said again looking at me as i got unsteadaly to my feet hoping beyond hope that i could just get to the office before i either passed out of vomited.
“We will Take it from here.” the doctor said. With a nod I went to the door where Zak was standing and waiting for more instructions he was coping a lot better then I was.
“Call people up see if they can come in and phone the agency as well. Call Dr Jordan at home as well and tell them the hospital is in a code red” I said to Zak as I past him on the way up the corridor trying to herd the other clients back into the lounge. Some like Summer where red eyed end crying others just stunned and not talking. For me things just moved in slow motion like a corny seen out of a medical drama when something like this happened.
“When you Can get another to cover I am going home Sick until then I will be in the office and only be available if I am really needed. I am not safe to around clients at the moment.” I said in a monotone voice. I new there was only so much time I could hold my self together now let alone any of the other clients that where going to need serious support through the rest of the night. Things like this didn’t happen much and when they did it knocked onto every one. I wanted to stay there and help but right there and then I was struggling to stay on my feet at all.
“ whenever it is possible I want every one who was below elevated to five minute checks. All usual harmers are to be put on suicide watch as well. Any one who is taking it very badly is to go straight to red observations at arms length.”
“Lauren you did really well but can you move Summer to the ECA for the moment.” I added calling sown the corridor to Lauren who nodded.
“I am sorry Zak but I have to get out of this.” I said again leaving Zak behind and walking slowly in the best control I could to the office. The echo’s of sobbing and Summers screaming behind me. I wanted to change things. I wanted to make it better for them so other kids didn’t have to experience Apple gate house like I had but instead I walked away from them all and closed the blind down on the little window on the office door. I could not change the world and make it better. I couldn’t save any one. Not even Mi.
<3
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