No more tomorrows
“Come on my love lets get you sorted out the in to a taxi home.” Jean said walking into the bathroom behind me seeing my body sprawled in an undignified position across the floor my head still lowered half way down the toilet while heaving occasionally from my body’s effort to get rid of the thing that was wrong.
“I will be fine soon.” I said meekly hardly believing it my self as another wave of intense nausea had my stomach trying to push upwards out of my mouth and even though I tried to control it my throat reacted by retching loudly while my head worked out the possibility of my sliding down the plug hole in my humiliation.
“You just had to do the hardest thing that any of us will ever have to do Esmee. I think a little freaking out should be aloud.” Jean said softly as she pulled the lose bits of hair that had escaped the elastic band back over my shoulders while with the other had drew patterns on the small of my back wither her finger tip and I had to squeeze away the tears that gathered in both my eyes.
“I just want to go home.” I said stiffly my voice jagged and short from my effort to keep my self together. “I just want to go home.” I moaned again getting to my feet and pressing the flush on the wall.
“Jean can you call me a taxi please.” I asked before splashing some water over my face and rinsing out my mouth to try and get the taste away but landed up only making it worse.
“Or do you want me to call Emmet see if he can come. Looks like you could do with him to hold you up in more ways then one at the moment.” Jean smiled sadly looking at my face.
“No Mia and Bobby will be in bed and It will take him forever to get them ready to get here not to mention if you tell him I was sick he will drive like a mad man and probably land up wrapping him self around a tree or something.” I said grimacing imagining the seen in my head. It seamed all to close to home right now and I wished I never mentioned it.
“Ok my love just get your self ready and I will get you a taxi and don’t threat. Whatever happens tomorrow is another day. Tomorrow we can try again.”
I also used to think that was true. I relied on tomorrows so much to try again the I spent most of my time thinking of them and it normally worked eventually a failure would turn into success even if it took a whole month of tomorrows but the words meant nothing now. Mi probably didn’t have tomorrow. For all I new she didn’t even have right now.
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